There was a naked man standing in an alley
And he weren't wearing no clothes
A naked man was standing in an alley
And he wasn't wearing no clothes
He said, "All that I need, I do believe,
Is a pair of black dress shoes"
Black dress shoes
(That's all a naked man really needs)
There was a red light lady on a corner
She looked like the richest woman in the world
Oh, a red light lady was standing on a corner
And she was looking like the richest woman in the world
(Here's why)
She had a fine fur coat upon her back
And a string of cultured pearls
Cultured pearls
(They's the kind that sip lots of tea and they read lots of poetry
Got culture in 'em)
There was a man found hanging in a jail cell
And they said it was suicide
A man was found hanging in a jail cell
And they told me it was suicide
Now you can blame the social system
But I still say it was his necktie
Necktie, necktie
Wowwww, my, my, wooooo, necktie
Now, now, now when I die won't you bury me
In a pair of black dress shoes
Oh, put a fine fur coat upon my back
Put a string of cultured pearls too
St Peter be so proud to have a woman like me
Come and see him when I die
And, you know, that they won't keep me out of those Pearly Gates
'Cause I'll be sure to wear my necktie
Necktie, necktie
Wowwww, my, my, my, my, wooooo, necktie