We'll be laughin' when the Walmarts hit the fan
While everyone is walkin' dead, we'll run Zombieland
When I was in the fifth grade a kid named Walker (Yeah)
Punched me in the gut, then he shoved me in a locker
One day, I'll be wearin' me an ear to ear grin
When he's bangin' on the door screamin', "Let me in!"
My ex best friend, let's call her Regina
Talked a lot of trash about me back in middle school theater
So when she's beggin' for the Aquafina in my freezer
Imma feed her to the dead and then I think I'll watch 'em eat her 'cause
You shoulda never fucked with my boy (My boy)
You shoulda never fucked with my girl (My girl)
You're all outta luck 'cause you're about to be so fucked at the end of the world
I can't wait for the apocalypse 'cause I know we survive (I know we survive)
Doomsday sounds ridiculously fun when we're the only ones alive
Baby, it's you and me versus all these brain dead NPCs (All these NPC's)
When the bots we created and the aliens invade, it's gonna be a pretty funny scene
So bring on the earthquakes, bring on the floods
I ain't afraid of nothin' because
Darlin', we'll be just fine
With my apocalips on yours and your apocalips on mine
We'll be laughin' when the Walmarts hit the fan (Walmarts hit the fan)
While everyone is walkin' dead, we'll run Zombieland (Haha, cute, yeah)
I feel bad for your ex-girlfriend, this bunker's full, sorry, Kate
I feel bad for your ex-boyfriend, I think his name was Zombie Bait
I feel bad for the girl who left you all alone
'Cause Imma save the dog but the bitch is on her own
I feel bad for the dude who broke your heart
'Cause there's only room for two on this arc
I'll be on my "I Am Legend" shit, you'll be the Will to my Smith
You're the Smith to my Wesson, on my hip
On my arm, you're the arma to my geddon
I don't know what everybody's dreadin', ha
I can't wait for the apocalypse 'cause I know we survive (I know we survive)
Doomsday sounds ridiculously fun when we're the only ones alive
Baby, it's you and me versus all these brain dead NPCs (All these NPC's)
When the bots we created and the aliens invade, it's gonna be a pretty funny scene
So bring on the earthquakes, bring on the floods
I ain't afraid of nothin' because
Darlin', we'll be just fine
With my apocalips on yours and your apocalips on mine
We'll be laughin' when the Walmarts hit the fan (Walmarts hit the fan)
While everyone is walkin' dead, we'll run Zombieland