Such a crazy love's got a weird drinking problem
I'm keel over and wasted
Like a Russian track in a cartoon film
I've got four flat tires and a busted hot air balloon
I've got a shrink I pay rent to so I can cry
On his couch
I bring my neighbor's caesar salads on my lunch break
They hire me to make dandelions safe again
And they pay me in bar soap
But no one will wanna fix a broken milkmaid cow
No one wants to be with a panto horse on a lonely
Emotional night
Some say I have a drink problem
I grin cos it's probably true
But tell me
Darling
Why do my drinking problems only ever kiss me like you?
She got some beautiful weird toothpaste back in her
Permed teeth
Tastes like hummingbirds and chimney stack lead paint
And my pumpkin pie can't slice the twine on her
Wedding ring
And if I didn't know better
I'd say she swam into my brain's eye
And she's sleeping in my cerebellum
But no one will wanna answer the ghosts from their
Car windows on the M1
And no one
Wants to discuss their best friend's new barber
But tell me
Darling
Do you ever get afraid of your life?
And why do my drinking problems only ever kiss me like you?
She pulls me around till my ankle striker drags on
The ground
And she's beautiful
Like someone's vacuum-choked shirt-strangled auntie
At the family reunion