i'm twenty four, i don't own a tie i don't have a job and i love to get high my hairline's receding, i'm getting a gut i love to jerk off and i love to read smut i can't beat you up, i can't run a mile i'm not calvin klein, but i gots my own style i smoke a pack a day, on a good day its two but with all my faults i'm still cooler than you i can't drive a stick, i don't really surf my parents disowned me cuz i'm a real jerk i don't really cook and i don't wash my car i can't program the timer on my vcr i hate doing laundry, can't stand washing a plate i haven't seen a girl naked since 1988 i know this sounds wrong but believe me its true with all this against me i'm still cooler than you now you must realize i don't mean what i say but lying to myself helps me get through the day we are the same, we are abbot and lou you are as i and i are as you