How many times can you
jump out of the cupboard
Before someone gets suspicious
or someone gets discovered
You can live forever in a split second of fame
Come on down the price
is right what's your name
While a crocodile makes good shoes
and a dog may change his coat
I can't change what's written
on your face tonight and I quote
Oh I wish you could see
Quite how much you could mean to me
You worthless thing
If you were ten feet taller
and almost handsome
I might pay this king's ransom
You worthless thing
They commit blue murder
along Union Avenue
Then they sell you souvenir matches
Nightclubs full of grave robbers
from Memphis Tennessee
And Las Vegas body snatchers
And he's carrying a warning
can't you see how his eyes glint
Keep your bloody hands off
my life your affectionate fingerprint
Oh I wish you could see
Quite how much you could mean to me
You worthless thing
If you were ten feet taller
and almost handsome
I might pay this king's ransom
You worthless thing
All the cars and pills and girls
who tore his shirt to tatters
Do you know how tall he was
'cos that is all that really matters
Do you know his mother's last name
do you think that he's divine
You've seen the film you've read the book
You're drinking Vintage Elvis Presley wine
Bored out of your tiny mind
while life is twice as large
They'll cut her down to size on television
She's available and beautiful
but with more time to devote
They're going to take this cable
now and stick it down your throat
So this is an obituary
which should be right
And fitting for every clockwork
cat and conceivable kitten
Oh I wish you could see
Quite how much you could mean to me
You worthless thing
If you were ten feet taller
and almost handsome
I might pay this king's ransom
You worthless thing
Oh you worthless thing
Oh you worthless thing